My life seems to move from one chaotic mess to the next. When I was younger, I would ask myself why. Life is messy, and everyone has some disorder. Some people are better at hiding it. As I become older, I am learning to be content in the chaos.
I have been through some difficult trials, and some of them have brought public humiliation. I have also had to apologize to people for my behavior and actions. I don’t think any of us are untouched regarding difficulties. I have learned things that help me navigate life when things get hard, and I want to share them with you.
Put God First In Your Life
Placing God first in your life does not ensure that you will not face difficult times. It may mean that you have more difficulties. However, it does mean that you have someone to talk to, pray to, and seek guidance from. Having a relationship with God allows me to pray and say the things I cannot speak to others. I can’t imagine going through a difficult time and not being able to pray and rely on God for strength. Contentment is being at peace and in a season of joy no matter what happens in your life.
Recognize And Understand Your Own Feelings
After a difficult divorce, I attended group counseling. It was one of the best things I ever did. In the counseling, I learned to recognize my feelings. Once I realized and understood my feelings, I could better manage my situation. When I am overwhelmed with emotion and things seem out of control, I try to take time and sort out my feelings. This may sound cliche, but it works. If I take a minute to think about how the situation makes me feel, I can move forward with a clear head.
A simple example is when we have company over, I get overwhelmed, and I end up snapping at my husband when he isn’t reading my mind as I think he should be. I ask myself why I am overwhelmed? I am afraid of being judged for having a less-than-perfect house. There is too much to do before the company arrives. I doubt my cooking skills. Once I recognize that these are the reasons I am feeling overwhelmed, then I can talk myself through them. Acknowledging my feelings, something as simple as saying I’m mad, sad, disappointed, can make a huge difference in how I react to situations. I’m not saying that I always do this, but it makes the chaos seem less chaotic when I do. It is an emotional state that is just as much mental health.
It Is Okay To Walk Away From People
There are instances when avoiding people is impossible, such as at family gatherings and in certain social situations. However, I have learned that it is not worth being around people that make your life miserable. It seems that some people’s goal in life is to make others miserable. I don’t understand that except that they are miserable and misery loves company. It’s okay. Evaluate the relationship and decide if you would be happier not being around them. I worked at a place for four years. I loved what I did and the people I worked with, except for my supervisor. For four years, she bullied and abused me, and when I finally had enough, I quit my job. I had trauma from working with her, and it took me almost a year to get over it, but I don’t regret leaving. I should have quit long before I did. Walking away from that situation was the best thing I did. I have walked away from unhealthy friendships to find peace and contentment in the past.
Well Off Is Hard To Beat
When I was a teenager and young adult and wanted something new and wanted it now, such as a new car, when I felt “new car fever,” my mom would tell me that “well off is hard to beat.” I think she was quoting her grandfather. While I didn’t understand the saying until later in life, I have decided that it is an excellent motto to live by. It is wise to be content and not always push to have the best of everything. Will you ever be satisfied if you constantly chase the next big thing or the newest trend? There is nothing wrong with working for new and better things, but living your life for the next material possession can lead to discontentment and disappointment. It has taken me a long time to learn this, but being happy with what you have for the time being is so much better than being miserable for what you don’t have.
Learning to be content in the chaos is a daily choice and one that I now make a lot easier. Life still throws curve balls at me, and I get sad and mad and depressed, but overall, I am content, and no one can take that from me.
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So true! It’s hard to walk away, but you are doing them and you a favor if it’s a toxic relationship.
Yes! This is so good. Thank you for this encouragment.
It’s like you wrote this piece just for me.
Putting God first cannot be stressed enough. I am finding my way back to Him, and it is the best thing ever.
I think you described me perfectly in “RECOGNIZE AND UNDERSTAND YOUR OWN FEELINGS.” I can relate to what you said. But when I am in such a moment, just like you, once I acknowledge my feelings, it makes the chaos less chaotic.
I can relate to the trauma you experienced with your boss, I have been there too, and it was one of the worst experiences ever. Every morning just before I hit my office, I would get a headache, and every afternoon as I left, the headache would go. I, too walked away from that situation and have been walking away or avoiding relationships that have been stressful ever since.
I don’t think I ever heard the saying ” Well off is hard to beat,” but it makes lots of sense.
Excellent post.
Thank you so much.
Wow! I see myself in your struggles, reflections and in the wisdom you have acquired through your journey. I also agree that living with the joy of the Lord is empowerment to live a happier life! I really enjoyed reading your piece. I appreciate you sharing so we can all benefit! BTW, thank you for reading my post. I’m having trouble with my blog and moderating the comments. I’ll keep at it!
Thank you. I am also having trouble with moderating the comments. Maybe it’s just a glitch and it will fix itself soon.